Friday, December 30, 2016

BSC #49: Claudia and the Genius of Elm Street

Tagline: How could a seven-year-old make Claudia feel so dumb?

Little Rosie Wilder is perfect at everything. She can sing and dance, she plays several musical instruments, and her I.Q. is so high, it's off the scale.

So how did Claudia "C-" Kishi get stuck baby-sitting for Rosie the genius? Because Rosie is so obnoxious, no one gets along with her - not even Claudia's sister, who's a genius, too.

The Baby-sitters think that Rosie needs to be taught a good lesson. But what Rosie really needs is a good friend... like Claudia.
Claudia is at home, gearing up to watch a documentary on Andy Warhol. She laments having to sit through annoying commercials, especially this one of a little girl spilling chocolate milk on a white carpet. She had tried to tape the documentary to watch at her own leisure, but in typical fashion, messed it up. This prompts Claudia to reflect on how much of a dunce she is compared to her sister. Of course, she doesn't dwell on this too long, as she also points out that she's incredibly artistic. Inspired by the documentary, Claudia runs up to her room to start on a new art project until the Club meeting starts.

At the meeting, they get a call from a new client: Ginger Wilder, who has a 7-year-old daughter named Rosie. Ginger's mother has come down with an unfortunate series of ailments, so Ginger needs to spend a few days a week helping her. Rosie has a million lessons though, so she can't come along. Mrs Wilder needs a sitter to come over three afternoons a week and essentially just be around and occasionally help Rosie with homework, while her lessons and practice will take up most of the time (the teachers all come to Rosie's place, which makes it easy on both Rosie and Claudia). Claudia is the only one free for most of the days needed, so she gets the job.

Claudia's first day with Rosie is less than stellar. First she's introduced to Rosie, who seems to be a gifted automaton, barely emoting, and practicing with fervor. Mrs Wilder goes over all of the lessons and things that Rosie has, outlining the schedule for when Claudia comes over. After some intense practicing, Rosie shows off for Claudia, showing her a song-and-tap number she's doing, as well as some violin and ballet. Then she goes to do some homework, which stumps Claudia, prompting Rosie to snort derisively at her. Claudia ends up going home feeling very little.

Next time, Claudia decides to treat her sitting job as a project, and vows to be cheerful, and furthermore, call Janine when Rosie needs help with homework. Rosie and Claudia help themselves to an after school snack, where Rosie continues to make Claudia feel small. Rosie is already concerned for her health and cholesterol, and while talking, Claudia figures out that Rosie was the little girl from the carpet commercial, prompting Rosie to say that that's her college fund. Claudia knows nothing of nutrition and cholesterol, and she certainly hasn't thought about college tuition yet. Before her lessons, Rosie needs help with science homework, so Claudia recruits Janine. She zones out while the two of them talk science, but when Janine goes to leave, Claudia remarks that not even Janine could relate to Rosie. Rosie goes on to her lessons, while Claudia stays hidden, drawing. As Claudia draws, she can hear the lessons, and she realizes that damn, they're hella intense and that Rosie's teachers are really pushing her. It makes Claudia feel bad for Rosie, especially after the lessons when Rosie is all flush and her voice is all hoarse. Rosie asks to see Claudia's drawings, which sparks some hope for Claudia. However Rosie declines an invitation to sit and draw, instead running away to hide in her room.

Stacey and Jessi both take a turn at sitting for Rosie, which is pretty awful for both of them. Stacey is forced to read a script to help Rosie do an audition, and Jessi thought she'd be able to bond with Rosie over their love of ballet, but instead has to ask Janine over to help with homework. Rosie questions Janine's intelligence, causing mild-mannered, shy Janine to snap. Rosie then snaps at Jessi, stating that she only wants to see Claudia from now on. At their Club meetings, the girls reflect that Rosie doesn't seem to love all the things she does, that she seems more like an overworked machine than a little girl. This causes Claudia to feel sympathy for Rosie.

At another sitting job, Rosie is yet again being bratty, asking Claudia things Claudia doesn't know, and then questioning her about it. Finally Claudia snaps and tells Rosie that she won't play her games anymore. So while Rosie continues her homework in silence, Claudia continues to draw. Eventually, Rosie starts drawing, and Claudia notices that Rosie's got a lot of talent. She's about to say something when Rosie's father unexpectedly comes home. Rosie quickly hides her drawings, prompting confusion from Claudia.

After another sitting job, where Claudia witnesses Rosie's parents treating her like a performer (and themselves like managers) instead of a child, and Rosie having a meltdown, Claudia takes Mary Anne to the elementary school to watch Rosie participate in a crossword puzzle competition. There, the children are horrible to Rosie, but Mary Anne and Claudia manage to cheer her up. Upon returning home, Claudia and Rosie decide to unwind by drawing, only to be caught by Rosie's parents. Rosie's parents chastise Rosie for wasting her time, and Rosie throws another fit and storming off to her room. Claudia decides to talk to Rosie's parents, letting them know how talented Rosie is. Of course, this doesn't quite pan out the way she wants, as it prompts the Wilders to start thinking about fancy art studios and schools and lessons they can start enrolling Rosie in. Claudia realizes now why Rosie hid her art: Rosie figured that her parents would try to turn it into a new career path, and suck all the fun out of it. Claudia tells Rosie that her parents are okay with the art thing, but that Rosie should probably explain to her parents that she's tired of doing everything to the extreme all the time. Eventually, Rosie does, and she cuts back on her activities, settling on the three things she likes best: math club, violin and art.

The subplot in this one is that after watching her documentary on Andy Warhol, Claudia is inspired to do a series of pop-art portraits of her favourite subject: junk food! Eventually the girls decide that Claudia should do an art show, to display her art. They help her to clean out the garage and turn it into a gallery. Because of her newfound talents in art, Claudia invites Rosie to display some of her stuff too. Things start off fairly well, with many neighbours and charges coming to see the art show. Of course, we can't have things go too well, and soon Alan Gray shows up. At first, he just makes "witty" comments to Claudia, but eventually Claudia finds out that he's quickly creating sketches and doodles of crude things and posting them alongside her art. Claudia gets mad and tells him off, sending Alan on his way. Alan's departure is all too easy, as Claudia then discovers that he's left wads of chewing gum all over the place. Kristy vows revenge, and the girls quickly get things cleaned up and settled. Claudia even sells two of her paintings! Ms Besser, from the elementary school buys one, as does Kristy's stepfather Watson.

Random Thoughts:
  • This one is ghostwritten by Peter Lerangis. I've come to notice that he doesn't make Claudia as stupid as the other ghostwriters do. She definitely struggles in school and with retaining knowledge and academic pursuits, but he also makes sure to highlight her artistic endeavors and her general observations and brightness. Case in point: she watches a documentary on Andy Warhol, and while she says that the documentary itself is boring, Andy Warhol isn't, and is actually inspired by his art style.
  • I remember reading this one often as a kid. I enjoyed it well enough now.
  • Although, I do have a bone to pick about calling Rosie a "genius". I don't her IQ is ever really mentioned in the book. While yes, she's clearly very bright and has a natural affinity for things, she's mostly talented and disciplined and well-trained. I feel like if she was a "genius" she'd be innovative and creating her own things, or not needing lessons or whatever.
  • Also: the description on the back of the book totally sucks. Claudia gets stuck with Rosie because she was the only sitter available for the majority of the days the Wilders needed. Also also: the Club never thinks Rosie needs a good lesson. They find her trying, but generally agree that she's probably not very happy and/or is insecure.
  • Some of what Rosie makes fun of Claudia for is for random trivia, like knowing whether or not foxes hibernate. I was pretty sure upon reading this that foxes don't hibernate, but I dunno if I was willing to fight to the death over it, because I honestly have not had to think about foxes and hibernation since elementary school science. That's why shows like Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader? piss me off, because it's all dependent on knowledge that is freshly learned in elementary school, but largely unnecessary in real-life. Unless of course, you study foxes and/or animal hibernation habits... or are an elementary school teacher haha
    • In case you were wondering: Foxes do not hibernate!
    • However, Rosie does criticize Claudia's spelling, which is totally valid. Reading, writing and basic math are all skills that everyone needs, should learn, and should attempt to hone.
  • In a bit of continuity, Claudia references the time when she studied under Mackenzie Clarke!
  • I also love how the girls are realistically portrayed in this book. They want to help Claudia with her art show, but bicker and get cranky when making invitations and doing cleaning because it's not fun nor is it going particularly well
  • Alan Gray is the worst in this one though. The worst. He's why boys suck haha Now I'm all bitter that he and Claudia eventually end up dating... even though that happens a billion years later, after repeating the 8th grade a million times and apparently slowly maturing over these years haha
  • This book really made me want Doritos and Milk Duds. I want some now. Sadly, the weather is terrible, so I had it in my head to spend the day indoors, being cozy, warm and reading haha
  • I know Claudia is talented and what not, but how the fuck does she, in the span of like, one month, sketch, draw and paint enough portraits of junk food to have an entire art show?? She'd need at least 6 to make it worthwhile. That's about one a week. And that's being generous. That's also whilst baby-sitting and attending school. Either Claudia did a really shitty job, and everyone is just humoring her, or... no, really, that's the only option. I honestly don't see how it's physically possible for her to turn out a minimum of 6 paintings in a maximum of 6 weeks, whilst still living her life haha god piss and my adult logic and reasoning!!!
  • I've always wondered what would happen if a sitter was needed during a Club meeting. Because sitting jobs are always vaguely described, you can just kinda pretend that none of the jobs featured in the books happen to coincide with meetings. EXCEPT FOR THIS ONE. Ginger clearly states that she needs a sitter Tuesday, Thursday and Friday, from after school until about 8pm. THAT'S CLEARLY DURING FRIDAY'S MEETING. There's even a chapter where Claudia says it's Friday, she picks Rosie up from school, and then mentions going for a walk together at 6:30! But the fact that the sitting job and the meetings overlap is never addressed!
    • Furthermore: if I was Claudia's parents, I'd be like, "Wtf, no, you can't baby-sit from 3:30 to 8:30pm three days a week. When are you planning on doing your homework??" I mean yes, because of all of Rosie's lessons (that don't involve Claudia having to do anything), Claudia could theoretically do her homework then. But Claudia is notorious for skipping homework or needing help with it, plus her grades are so tenuous to begin with. I would not trust her to use her time responsibly and to stay on top of things. (In fact, us readers know that Claudia spends most of the time drawing!)
  • The Wilders are horrible parents. They've scheduled every minute of this poor girl's life, turning every single talent or interest into a career path, parading her around to auditions and shows and various other things to show her off. I'm not surprised Rosie is the least bit bratty. She's either repeating things her parents have taught her, used to interacting with others only in a performance setting (other children are competition/distractions, adults are to be impressed), or she's incredibly stressed or under pressure. I don't want to say that the Wilders are abusive... but there's definitely something wrong about the way they treat their daughter. I shudder to think how Rosie would have turned out if Claudia hadn't encouraged her to say anything to her parents. Hell, we still don't know how Rosie turns out! For all we know, her parents quickly revert back to their old ways
    • Apparently Rosie is featured in two other books, but they're both books I actually haven't read. But still! Those would still be two books theoretically only "later this year". Again, who knows how they'd be when Rosie was 10 or 13 or 16 or whatever.
  • Apparently the Wilders ask Claudia to become Rosie's art teacher, but much like Claudia tutoring Emily Michelle, this never gets mentioned again haha

5 comments:

  1. The Wilders really are the worst. And yes, this book made me so hungry!

    No mention of Uncle Dandy! I always liked that part because in the Philadelphia area, we had Al Alberts and the little kids on the show called him "Uncle Al". Super creepy!

    And the part with the family singing songs, in harmony, in the car always blew me away. I still don't even understand how that works but we never sang in the car unless it was with the radio.

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    1. Haha because of the holidays, I was feeling crunched for time, and by the time I got to recapping the Uncle Dandy part, I was just done. We never had a local Uncle Dandy equivalent, so while I thought Uncle Dandy was creepy as a child, he never really personally resonated with me haha

      Yeah, my family doesn't sing in the car. Or any where, really. Not even if we're listening to the radio or at a concert or a musical or anything that might encourage singing. We're just not like that.

      My friends and I on the other hand... When my friends and I hit the age where some of us now had our driver's licenses and could drive alone, we used to go on long car rides, and make mix-CDs, and what not... We would sing along. Sometimes in unison, sometimes in harmony, usually also singing the instrumental parts too haha We did that for YEARS. We would even make up our own harmony lines sometimes, dissolving into giggles if it went horribly wrong. We were really really nerdy haha

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  2. The Wilders' problem is that Rosie's not allowed to enjoy anything or have leisure activities. Everything must have a Purpose or a Reason. She's not allowed to be a kid.

    And a side note, she's named after the daughter of the author of the Little House books. Laura Ingalls married Almanzo Wilder, and their one living child was a daughter named Rose. Not sure if it's a coincidence, but I find it amusing.

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    1. They also treat her like a commodity. I wouldn't be surprised if they had insurance specifically on her hands and voice or something. She wasn't allowed to eat ice cream because it would have been bad for her throat and then told she shouldn't throw tantrums because "it's not good for performers". The poor child is a child! Surely she could have some ice cream every now and then!

      And I had no idea she was named after Laura Ingalls Wilder's daughter, but it makes sense now that I've read that. I used to love watching the show when I was a child with my mom. I keep meaning to read the books, but never have the time.

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    2. Yeah, maybe coincidence, maybe not. I think the books are great, but I actually don't like the show much. The two are very different!

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